.: a silent permission :.

How could one human soul ever even begin to think that it could truly know another? We assume so much so often, and pay the price of fellowship when we are poorly mistaken. Maybe that other person doesn't want to be discovered. Then why do we obligate them to enter into our way of coping? Maybe they would choose to just keep falling. Maybe they want to embrace the full weight of every decision that they have ever made up until that moment. Maybe they want to be allowed to have everything that they feel will grant them satisfaction, no matter how temporary we may know it really is. We need to stop keeping people from making the mistakes that they are dying to make. Sometimes, we need to let them feel the warmth on their faces from the bridges that they are burning. And we certainly need to stop assuming that we know what leg of the journey they are at in their lives.

Could we dare to hold our tongues, and could we possibly choose to offer silence as opposed to our home-cooked remedies? Would that be as tragic as we have so quickly assumed? People need to sometimes be given the sort of patience that gives them over to their preferred modes of functioning. And instead of only adding to the pressure that leaves them feeling like they are dying on the inside, could we choose to honor them by not offering them the maps that we have fashioned for our own paths? What is it that makes us so quick to think that people want to be saved?

I guess that I am just growing tired of those who drain others through their particular style of showing care and concern. Some of us have way too much of ourselves invested in our role of helping those all around us. Is there any space even left for us to fulfill our callings and still never receive any praise? This fixation upon success has subtly attached itself onto our sense of simply obeying the Lord's aim for our lives. None of us wants to just fill a role. None of us wants to just be there. Yet that is sometimes the very thing that our friends or family need. I realize that very thought only leaves us with feelings of discouragement and disappointment, causing us to maybe assume the worst. But is there something to be gained by not presuming that we know why something might be happening to someone else? Perhaps we could even grow by first deciding to no longer think that it somehow centers on ourselves, or that we are the key to another person's future or freedom.

I long for the Body of Christ to be a gathering of people who see themselves in the business of setting others free. Unfortunately (for all who stand guilty), that begins by doing it in a way that they do not even notice it. And though some of us see ourselves in the role of naming reality for others, we need to not require that they take our words as the Gospel truth. I will be the first to admit it - I don't want to be average! I want to have an impact and make a difference upon the world all around me (though in truth, I would be fortunate to have even a slight impact upon even one of the communities in which I live). But we need to be allowing others to fail, especially when that definition has been self-fashioned. What will it take for us to set others free from any and all expectations?

As followers of Christ, we don't get to be their savior and healer. At best, we can only help in the process. But there is much to be gained in seeking the Spirit's leading in His work, rather than placing the foundation for our own upon their hearts and minds. Since we all see so dimly, we would be safe to assume that we are never able to see the full picture. Our visions are bound to be blurry. So let us commit to moving forward under that conviction. And though it is terrifying at such a deep level to have our meter of success intrinsically tied to something that we cannot control, we need to move away from saying something, even if it is lying on our tongues. The boldness to speak is not the same as the permission to speak. I promise you here and now - your life is sure to be filled with a long list of people who have failed to come through for you time and again. Truth be told, there isn't even anything to be gained in comparing such lists. But maybe we could enter into other people's world only so far as they open the doors... and no further.

The Spirit stands ready to act and move once we choose to hold off on our own attempts to do so. We are called to love one another. That begins by seeing that it is His work to make them holy. Sometimes, all we get to do is watch and pray.