.: reality and the unsurpassed :.

Regret. It leaves us desperately wanting to rewrite the past. We had set out with great expectations of what would come of you and me. The story has taken turns and twists that leave us wanting more. But spaces remain that could easily make it all dwindle down to the mistakes of our best intentions. We would never have wanted to cast shadows upon what stirs the deepest of joy within us. And it's not as if it continues to be so effortless to repeat. We can try and try harder each time, but we cannot reshape how things have already come about. There is far too much going for us to allow such moments to surpass what lies within the future. But will it haunt us in unguarded pieces of our lives? It was absurd to think that we could find perfection in every movement, though I admit I was hoping for it for us alone. This life contains more muddle to it than I am used to living with. Traditions and systems have taught me otherwise for far too long. But days like these are stretching us, painting with colors darker than the past. But we have done nothing upon which shame could attach itself for any longer than an instant. Daylight calls us into that life beyond ourselves, in which we find the essence of both Creator and Creation. We can rise above what we want and enter into what we long for. These emotions, they come and they go. But that which has been unsurpassed becomes reality as we surrender ourselves at any given occasion to what will speak His glory into that which keeps unfolding. We have no room for regret in our hearts, for our spirit desires to see that work take root. And it is, brilliantly erasing every opportunity for disappointment to creep in. Tastes of things to come are moments of unfading hope. We can continue, knowing that we cannot unravel these ties of devotion.

.: the importance of being alone :.

We are far too distracted from the discipline of healthy introspection when we get caught up in the flood of maintaining relationships. There is an inner dialogue that eventually begins to rise up, questioning if you really are who you once saw yourself to be. The lens of your mind’s eye develops some sort of steam on it, and you find little to no time to deal with it. Eventually you grow to take your temperature from other people’s reaction to your antics, all the while wondering if you are selling little pieces of your heart for the sake of good interactions. You breathe a sigh of relief when potential time alone presents itself, only to have it stolen by the “ought to” or “always have”. Rest will hopefully make its way to you soon – the chance of finding some is unlikely. You need this. You need time to take your own pulse and to set yourself straight once again. You need to trace your steps, and if the need be, discover how you have ended up in this particular place. No one is going to fight for that “space” for you, not even the ones you give yourself for. Especially them. But you will not be able to give what you do not realize you even possess. Not if you don’t somehow find the time. Schedules and routines have a way of running you at their own demanding pace. But do not accept the obligation to live like that without some sort of necessary compromise. Leave them wanting more. Give them time to themselves. Make that call and take the heat for seeming to be the more unloving of you both. You need to know who you are. You need to recall where you are heading. You must see the subtle compromises that may have been made to find what you were looking for. And you need to settle all bets, to betray those alliances that are stealing life from you, and to recollect the strength and confidence that is your own – that which no one else but the Father has placed within you.