.: he knew :.

One of the deepest realities that I have been waking up to lately is the idea that if I don't do things God's way and I take matters into my own hands, I have great cause to worry... for at that point, I am the one in control... and control over my circumstances is one thing I do not have. I need Him... I need Him in control! Thus, the sense and desire to be fully honest and upright have been heavy upon my heart as of late. I want to know more fully that He is indeed the One who is in control.

A particular passage I was wrestling with this past Sunday morning is that of John 2:24-25;

"But Jesus would not entrust himself to them... for He knew all men. He did not need man's testimony about man, for He knew what was in a man."

My thoughts: what exactly is "that"? What does Jesus know... and is it what I am maybe just now beginning to discover in everyone around me, as well as myself? The fact is, Jesus saw them for who they truly were - frauds, liars, manipulators... many of whom were trying to kill him. I get the sense that this passage is saying that he didn't need them to come through for him, and frankly he refused to trust them... for he knew exactly the thoughts and desires and motives of their hearts. He pulled no punches. He saw them fully, and so he carried himself with incredible wisdom and discretion around them.

Where do I fit into that, especially regarding how I carry myself around others... as well as in what ways I "entrust" myself to others? Just with regards to my expectations of others to come through for me; those come into a different light and I begin to discover much of my own personal heartache.